Chapter: Uni is Awesome

So while Jed was sleeping off his big freak out, Ally and I check out the house.  It’s way bigger than Jed’s Grandpa’s place. Like, way.  Like there’s actually rooms, and stuff.  And we don’t have to eat outside.

Ally takes the small room in the back, and Jed and I take the big room in the front.  Mostly cause that’s where Jed crashed.  And also, there’s a bed that doesn’t eat people, ha.



There’s like a shiny kitchen and a big refrigerator.  Ally opens it and like, shakes her head and says, “I hate these new refrigerators, man, all these vegetable drawers and no room for brew.”  We keep looking.

There’s like a big living room and … still no TV.  WTF.  Who are these people, man, no TV.  I hope at least they have a garden, ha.  So we go outside to check out the yard.  Like, it’s huge, but there’s no garden.  “Dude”, I say.  “There is no garden.  That is so sad.”

Ally says, “I’m on it”.  We keep looking.  There’s like bikes for all of us and bike racks.  Awesome.  No more bus.  There’s also like, a garage.  Ally’s like, “Do you think he got a car?” and we go in.

Phew. It smells like old stuff.  There’s no car.  But there is, like, a gas station toilet, and some old books, and a table.  And like a lounge chair, with like a hair dryer on it.  There’s a TV on the wall, but it just gets the Uni channel, and there’s no remote, lame.  There’s like a bunch of cabinets.  I open them, but there’s just like junk in there.

“BREW FRIDGE!”  Ally runs over to check it out, she’s like pfft.  “Empty.  Well, we’ll fix that.”  Then she looks at me.  “Tair.  We should like, smoke in here.” 

Oh, yeah. At Jed’s Grandpa’s place, we used to smoke outside, cause Jed hates the smell.  But it gets cold in East Midcentralburg at night, man.  Inside would be much cozier – whoa.  There’s like a No Smoking sign on the wall.  I point.

“Exactly”, she says.  Ha.  Fist bump.

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Jed and I got invited to a mixer. Which like, sounds lame, but before we had our fight, Bree said to go, like there’s free stuff.  So then Ally comes with us to this mixer thing.  “Freebies. I’m there.”  But when we get there she like grabs a footie sack, and looks around and says, “Hey.  This is pretty student-y. I’ll, uh, see ya later.”

Dunno what she’s doing.

Anyway, Jed and me, we go upstairs to the mixer.  They don’t have brew, lame, but they have energy drinks.  So we have a few.  Jed so he can study, and me so I can like meet all the chicks, ha.

Well JED’S happy.

Finally some other people come in...and it's Bree. She said she'd be here, but like, working.  She's not in the llama suit today, though.  She stops when she sees me.  Jed goes like "eep" and heads for the video games, while Bree walks over.

"Hey", she says.

"Hey", I say.  Is she still mad?

"Ohhhhh....I was so gonna still be mad", she says.

But no. Gotcha.

She says she wants to take me to dinner, later.  I was like, hey, check out the new house, cause like there’s a new bed that might not kill us, ha.  But she’s like, no.

“Let me take you out, Tarik.  We need to talk”, she says.  Then she like kisses me again – just a little one this time – and then she’s like, “Working” and she runs downstairs.

Well, free food. I guess I can talk a little for free food, ha.

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So one good thing about the mixer being lame, Jed’s not freaked out all day.  He’s like, almost happy.  And he’s good at ping pong, who knew.

“Want to play again?” he says.

“Best 5 of 6”, I say.

“5 of 9”, Jed says.

“Whatever”, I say, “I’m gonna win all the rest.”

“Statistically unlikely”, says Jed. “I win at something else too.”

Wow he’s almost…cocky.  Who knew.  “What’s that?”  I say.

“Chicks”, he says.

Yeah no. “I don’t THINK SO…”

“It’s chicks.  Look”, he says.

Oh. Huh.

So Jed and I play some more, but then Jed doesn’t want to go for best 9 of 10.  Whatever. So we go eat and then we go home.  I guess Ally didn’t get lucky cause like, she’s already home when we get there. 

Jed says, “All right, Tair, now we should study”.

"Dude. Seriously. We did that in high school.", I say.

"But Tair!  Class starts tomorrow! We just have time to ...", Jed's like on a roll.

But then Ally’s like, “Hey Tair, let’s check out the garage”, and she’s winking at me.  I hope this means what I think it means, ha.

“Hey, uh, Jed, we’re uh, gonna, like, check out the garage”, I say.

He looks at me, and then Ally, and then me. “Does that mean smoke?”, he says.

I’m like, ha.

Jed kind of shudders. "No way, man. You guys can have the garage.  I'll be in here. STUDYING!" and he’s like books off with his book...

...while Ally and I book for the garage.  NOT with a book, ha. Ally gets there first.  She opens the door like, “TA DA” and shit.

Whoa!  This is like, more like it.  There’s some chairs and shit and a TV thank DUB and she put up our Moronic Trio poster from the Valley and that’s cool but OH MY DUB there’s a bong. Like, a big ass bong.

“Ally!” 

She shrugs. “Happy college, little bro.”  Then she opens the refrigerator.  It’s now full of brew.  “Now THAT’s a brew fridge.”  She grabs a couple and hands me one.  Then she like winks at me and says, “Also. There is a planter outside your room, man.  In case you want to grow anything.”

Uni. Is. Awesome.

Even if I have to go to class tomorrow.